The Little Things Are Awesome

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Inventing an Entrance for the New Year

There was a tragic downpour a couple of days ago and I got stranded for quite a while at home. I was supposed to go back to work. Nearly excited I was. I mean, I’ve always loved work.

It was the last working day for a few of us. It made me think of a few things I needed to change for the new year. I could probably enumerate some.

I need a new niche. Like a new alcove for new experiences. One that’s not only going to replace all the bad sh*t I went through 2012. But a place where I can finally have more liberty. So I talked to a friend about moving in with them. The price is okay. At least, I get to meet new people. I get to move into a different breathing space. It’s nice and refreshing. I pray that it’s in God’s plan for me to move.

Less talking. More listening. Everybody may haven’t noticed anything about my awareness of my own rattling. Because there are people who thrive for the spotlight too. And I’m as close to pissing some people off with my arsenal of words. I’m not embarrassed. Well, a little. But I neither want to beat myself up about it. It is the way it is. It’s part of my natural defects.

Stay as smart as possible when in love. You see, lately, I’ve been crushing on somebody. He’s cute. We almost like the same stuff/bands/movies. We’re barely opposite except for our genders, thank God. But one thing I figured when this new rapture barged in, I can’t even remember the last time I invested so much of who I am. This feeling is as virgin as the coconut oil. I mean, I never felt like this for as long as I can remember. Not having to worry at night that he might fall for other girls and stuff. Have I taken a notch up to the maturity bar? I might have. But whatever, I feel happier. I just bought that Ramon Bautista book entitled: Bakit Hindi ka Crush ng Crush Mo? (Why your Crush doesn’t have a Crush on You.) I’m glad I did. He’s just plainly telling us that life is fun if only we learn to find out how. If our love relationships are down, so should our life right? Friggin’ wrong. According to his Modular Life System, our love life should serve as an elective. All he’s saying is, you don’t need a love life to be at your happiest; also don’t fall in love when you’re not ready for the wasakan (chaotic) part. That we don’t have to dumb ourselves down for anybody who treat us like wet rags. As that Perks of Being a Wallflower dialogue goes: “Why do I and everyone I love pick people who treat us like we’re nothing?” and that witty response just killed it: “We accept the love we think we deserve.” So yeah, let’s not hang out with assholes this time, shall we?

New ways to take care of myself more. Now that I fancy somebody new, my friends keep on irking me about how I carry myself, the way I dress up, the way I style my hair. Just everything physical in particular. Well girls, when it comes to these things, I’m positively prone to reckless abandoning. But as I reflect on how broken I only become if I stay the same, I’m finally getting all my sh*t together to do something about, well… me. I’m tired of being an eyesore. If I can’t do it for myself, I’ll do it for the new guy crush and for God, who’s given me so much than I feel I deserve.

Pa-Hardcore Deep Ka Pa Dyan